DE-FAULT

Sometimes you fall apart. Sometimes you pass out. And you can break down or log off

just any old time.

Apparently.

This is what the doctor will tell you.

Without any burden or stress in your life

and without a change in routine

or diet

or sleep patterns,

you can just crash.

Like, right through your chest and onto the floor.

This can happen at 2:35 pm,

after a burger and a beer and a trip to the bowling alley;

or it can happen when tucked into bed after a filet of salmon and a glass of pinot noir

on your garden patio.

This can happen when you’re walking down street

or driving a bus full of passengers on the highway

or flying a plane over the Pacific.

It might be “because your potassium is a little low”

and you “need to drink more orange juice.”

Or it might be for no discernible reason at all.

It might be because it’s Tuesday and you haven’t been to the emergency room

in fifteen years.

Or “You could have low blood sugar: you should have a Coke now and again.”

All of which tells you little about yourself and more about the state of medicine

and our healthcare system

and the basic understanding, of lack thereof, of our healthcare practitioners.

And you or your cat can be writhing in pain a night long

and then find her or yourself bleeding.

And you can wind up in the vet hospital or the General talking to a nurse.

You can describe sweating more than you have ever sweat

and talk about sopping up blood, yours or your cat's.

And they can still write this up as "patient saw some redness"

and your being "tired" or "dehydrated".

And then the doctor can come through and tell you

none of it is anything,

nothing at all,

and you,

or you and the cat,

should go home.

And that should be your take-away:

nothing is anything, anything at all.